Watch this:
Oh for fuck’s sake. I mean, for fuck’s sake. Just look at this asshole. No I insist, take a good long look, and let it sink in fully that this is the brainstem now leading a sorrowfully diminished United States over the lip of an illiberal, friendless abyss from which it may never resurface. Perhaps, after what I’m sure will be many repeat views, you’ll feel inclined to chime in with best-selling author and veteran Trump hater Don Winslow:
I can believe it. I sort of have to, because, well, there he is, and they’re playing Hail to the Chief at him, when they aren’t indulging his more whimsical urges by spinning Village People oldies like they’re The President’s Own Studio 54 DeeJays.
For some reason this hilariously terrifying video, taken from Donald’s Inaugural Ball last January, slipped under my radar, and I only just discovered it because it’s now being recirculated on X and other social media sites. Why is it doing the rounds again? Perhaps because Donald is now reaching the sort of Peak Trump presaged by his ludicrous inaugural sword-waving disco bop, what with his spectacularly ill-advised war of choice in Iran turning out about as well as most of us in the wannabe pundit class predicted. You’ll have noted that the, er, special military operation hasn’t quite been the romp that Donald must have anticipated. In fact, thus far, the campaign in the Gulf has served mainly to combine with his failed and illegal tariffs (still being imposed, despite the SCOTUS ruling, via some dubious statutory work-around) to throttle the US economy, while comprehensively undermining America’s geopolitical standing and influence, and alienating pretty much everybody among the nations soon to be known conventionally as “America’s former allies”. That’s what they’ll be called, you know. Oh yes, the phrase will trip smoothly off of everybody’s tongue, you’ll be watching the evening news and the anchor will be saying something like “America’s former allies attended a summit in Brussels today…“. It was heading that way anyhow, especially after the threats to annex Canada and invade Greenland, but the godawful mess in the Persian Gulf gave Donald his chance to seal the deal; having called upon NATO nations to help re-open the Strait of Hormuz, and then, following the inevitable lack of enthusiasm within the alliance to risk life and treasure cleaning up Donald’s mess, having declared that the US doesn’t need anybody’s help anyway, AND NEVER DID, Trump circulated this bleat on his miserable faux-Twitter knockoff site:
Now he’s talking about formally exiting NATO once and for all, because why should the US be there for those ingrate Eurotrash yellow-bellies when they wouldn’t likewise be there for America in its time of dire need? Right? Except America doesn’t need them, the brie-gulping panty-waists, but that’s not the point. The point is, Donald called, and they all told him to pound sand, supposedly because NATO is a defensive alliance, not the underwriter of Trumpian aggression, and anyway they weren’t consulted before Donald started his war, yada yada yada, waah waah waah. Oh yeah? Well screw them. Up theirs with a wire brush. They can go get their own oil and gas, it’s not America’s problem anymore. Fuck you, France et al.
To which, I’m betting, the diplomatic response will be “no, no, fuck you“.
Donald’s latest musings, on line and in front of the cameras, seem to indicate that he’s thinking about declaring victory and skedaddling out of the Gulf, cutting his losses and leaving the Mullahs astride the Strait manning their lucrative Islamic Tollbooth, but you know, that’s what he’s saying today. Who knows what he’ll do tomorrow? Not me. Not you. Not him either. He’ll soon have assembled significant assets – a few thousand paratroopers from the 82nd Airborne, two Marine Expeditionary Units, and three, count ’em three carrier battle groups – sufficient for some form of reckless misuse, should he decide to escalate, probably with disastrous consequences. Between Kharg Island, buried stocks of enriched uranium hidden underground somewhere or other, and miles upon miles of Iranian coastline that might seem worth seizing, there’re any number of opportunities to send in the grunts and sink deeper into the tar pit. Tempting!
Or maybe he’ll TACO and bug out.
See, the word is that Donnie’s grown bored with the Iran excursion (not a “war”), and wants to move on to other things, like his Giant Ballroom (now on hold while an injunction works its way through the legal maze, but Donald isn’t likely to let that stop him):
…and, just outside of the hallowed ground of Arlington, a new Arc de Triomphe à la Trump:
…not to mention the design of his new Presidential Library:
…and oh yeah, maybe an invasion of Cuba. The Iran thing didn’t go so well, but Cuba should be a lot easier, for one thing it’s just 90 miles away, and for another it’s relatively wee, both geographically and population-wise, with feeble military defences and a teetering government that’s just ripe for it. That’s what Li’l Marco says. So yeah, maybe slap a regime change/conquest on little Cuba, and open the place up to Trump-branded hotels, casinos and other such shit, because listen, the island’s a developer’s paradise, palm trees and beaches everywhere! Think of the all-inclusive resorts! Think of the golf courses!
Whatever, getting back to the planned Presidential Library, get a load of these latest renders. Trump wants an interior Hall of The Donald, with a ten meter gold statue of himself centre stage, upon which the assembled hordes of visitors can gaze in wonder:
Just like Ozymandias, only golder! Look upon my works, ye mighty, and despair!
The building itself, well, it’ll be a doozy! Donny figures it should be a massive 47 storey skyscraper, branded of course:
He’s planning it for Miami, about 75 miles south of Mar-a-Lago, and therefore proximate to Donny’s favourite place in the whole wide world, where he’d probably have preferred to put it except there aren’t enough locals to gawk at the desired scale, so better to gift it to the grateful citizens of Miami, the lucky duckies! There’s a whole video too, look!
Now that’s a legacy, albeit one with rather a lot of space to fill. Not that there won’t be numerous mammoth Trump achievements to tout through the construction of all sorts of dioramas, celebratory video displays, wax replicas and so forth (think of all those wars he ended, all the military triumphs, and bringing back manufacturing, that sort of stuff), and don’t let’s forget the big room in which an authentic great big Air Force One will be parked, but still. Lot’s of square footage. I wonder if it’ll be part hotel too, maybe with some retail chucked in? Anyway, it’ll be magnificent, and very very tall, the tallest library of any President, taller than anybody’s ever seen, the greatest ever, way better than Obama’s. I can’t wait! I only hope that His Trumpness lives long enough to attend the grand opening, when he can do his little YMCA victory jig at the ribbon cutting ceremony. God willing! I mean, geez Louise, what if he doesn’t live to see his greatness commemorated in steel, glass, and gold?
Perish the thought.
UPDATE: I was just kidding about the hotel. I now read that this is, in fact, the plan. There are also, predictably, several grifts being reported, surrounding both the donation of the land in Miami and corporate sponsorships – at this point, pretty standard stuff.
the needlefish 