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As you can see, just here to wander about in an orderly fashion, officer!

…Representative Andrew Clyde (R-Ga.), for this honestly amazing performance:

An avid promoter of conspiracy theories and (of course) gun rights, Clyde was last seen being fined US$15,000 for refusing to be screened through metal detectors before entering the House Chamber, presumably because he wanted to be packing heat for the next vote, just in case. He probably should have won a Gomey for that, but we can redress that injustice now by recognizing his strenuous exertions in the promotion of the latest GOP insanity, which might be referred to as the “It Never Happened” gambit.

In their relentless, years-long campaign to utterly eradicate democracy in the United States, an effort that began long before Trump but accelerated mightily when Fat Donny demonstrated the true scope of what they could get away with, the Republicans have reached the conclusion that they can gaslight the Base about pretty much anything. In the immediate aftermath of the January 6 insurrection, the initial ploy was to insist, despite an almost incomprehensibly massive crapload of evidence to the contrary, that the Capitol wasn’t really sacked by Trump supporters. It was sacked all right, no denying that (so they must have thought, initially), but actually it was those black and brown types from the dreaded Antifa and Black Lives Matter terrorist organizations. All those Trump banners and MAGA signs were a ruse – the classic tactic of a literal “false flag” operation. The complete absence of any non-Caucasian faces in all the video footage was just another facet of their diabolical scheme.

They ran with that for a couple of weeks. Then it must have occurred to them: who says there’s no denying that the Capitol was actually sacked? What have we learned these past five years, gentlemen? So they switched gears, and have for months now been selling the claim that there were no riots, it was not an insurrection, nobody sacked anything, and the rabid horde that stormed the halls of Congress at the cost of five lives and hundreds of serious injuries to Capitol Police officers was in fact composed entirely of well-behaved citizens, assembling peacefully on a day trip to watch democracy in action. There was certainly no plan on anybody’s part to hang Mike Pence from the gallows that was never assembled for any such purpose in front of the Capitol Reflecting Pool. Fake news!

Thus we have representative Clyde stating yesterday at a committee hearing:

But let me be clear, there was no insurrection and to call it an insurrection in my opinion, is a bold faced lie. Watching the TV footage of those who entered the Capitol, and walk through Statuary Hall showed people in an orderly fashion staying between the stanchions and ropes taking videos and pictures, you know. If you didn’t know that TV footage was a video from January the sixth, you would actually think it was a normal tourist visit.

When we get around to creating a Gohmert Hall of Fame, that definitely gets him inducted, first ballot, waiting period waived.

It’s not within my power to remand this elected official, no doubt beloved by the MAGA Monsters who elected him, to a “black site” in Thailand, there to be waterboarded and flogged before being covered in honey and strapped to the top of an anthill, so I’ll have to content myself by awarding the Gomey.

Here you go, Andy.

One comment on “And the Gohmert Goes To…

  1. Cethru Cellophane says:

    Clyde needs a lobectomy or, maybe he’s already had one. What on earth is behind this latest moronic talk? What is the end result if the GOP destroys democracy and becomes autocratic. or have they not thought this through?

    Like

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